ME (walking into the bathroom): Hang on, Lucy, I need to use the restroom.
LUCY (following me): What? You have to go potty?
LUCY: Pee-pee or poo-poo?
ME: I don’t know. Maybe both.
LUCY: Can I see?
ME: Can I stop you?
LUCY (in a sing-song voice): Nooo-ooo-ooo!
ME (getting ready to take a seat on the “throne”): Okay, then.
LUCY (panicked): Wait, don’t go yet, Mommy! Let me get my telescope!
ME: What? NO!
LUCY: But I really want to see!
ME: You can see just fine with your eyes from where you are.
LUCY: Can I get closer?
ME: NO! Lucy, seriously, Mommy needs a little privacy.
LUCY: Private-see? What’s private-see?
ME: That’s when you give people space to do their potty business. Or to shower. Or to change their clothes. Really, people like privacy any time they are naked.
LUCY: Really? That’s silly business.
ME: Nope. Privacy is good business.
LUCY: Mommy, you are so silly. Now, let me see your potty! Can I help you wipe?